by: Rex Godinez Ortega

AM I too funny to unfriend?

Whatever the reason was that I survived the annual FaceBook spring cleaning of my “friends”, I can only say: Happy New Year!

I can’t promise they won’t regret it, though, as I do tend to like to live “dangerously”.

In fact, I’ve always been less forgiving in my own Facebook Trimming campaigns in the past.

Indeed. Those were the days when I could care less.

Too much Facebragging—unfriend; Too annoying—unfriend; Not a Liker, eh?—unfriend; Who, you?—unfriend

I was the judge, jury, and executioner for those on trial for unfriendable offenses.

Broadcasting stupidity—unfriend; Atrocious grammar—unfriend; Drama Queen—unfriend; Another album of selfies?? (By golly!)—unfriend.

Click! Click! Click! I was clicking my way to Hermitbook at the rate I was going.

Thus, before I knew it, I was down to only a handful of “friends”.

Ok. Forty. Just 40 Facebook friends.

The immediate benefits to having such a small number of Facebook friends is that you only see updates from friends you really care to hear from.


(Foto: themetapicture.com)

This translates to a less cluttered newsfeed. (And my, does that truly make for better reading!)

The bonus for me was that you no longer have to contend with the endless flow of posts from those serial selfie-takers.

Ugh! Some of them should be told the truth, pronto!

I recall someone leaving a comment on a “friend’s” 10th selfie post for the day screaming: “Sakto na! [That’s enough!]”

That had me in stitches.

Anyway, aside from the benefits to be had, unfriending exercises actually also serve to jog our memories about who our real friends were.

I realized then that there were several other reasons that make friends grow apart aside from distance.

What some “friends” post on Facebook is a good indicator—no, reminder—of why we stopped talking to them in the first place or why we didn’t hang out with them in real life.

What I failed to realize, however, was how “friends” would react to being unfriended on Facebook.

Now, I get the cold shoulder or lukewarm greetings every time I bump into someone I unfriended, like that former high school classmate of mine.

I guess it didn’t help that we had a little reunion at the wake for the father of another former classmate just a week before I unfriended her.

I had thought that it was pointless to keep “friends” that one had absolutely zero interaction with on Facebook—even though you were friends in real life.

I even got a “hurt letter” from another friend, saying it left her questioning our friendship.

Well, I had also thought that hiding one’s posts from my newsfeed meant the person didn’t want me to know what was going on with his or her life.

What’s the point of trying to “connect with your friends online” then?

What’s painfully clear now is that people view the act of unfriending as rude. Some, as shown, take it badly.


(Foto: mashable.com)

When I mentioned the first incident to my regular friends, they were aghast. They agreed with my reasons, but, nonetheless, I was adjudged the impolite one. (Imagine that.)

They obviously drew the line on deleting someone you actually knew in real life from your Facebook friends list.

It seemed from our conversation, too, that I was ignorant of the other options to unfriending that was available to one on Facebook.

Ahh, yes, there’s the “Hide” button. Funny how it seems so well-hidden. And it doesn’t seem to do the job properly.

However, what I consider a discovery is the “Following/Follow” button. (Hey, isn’t that where “Subscribe” used to be?)

It functions like the “Hide All” button; and effectively removes from your newsfeed the updates and posts of “friends” whom you would otherwise be tempted to delete.

It’s a relatively new addition on Facebook, I understand, and it has become my new best friend these days.

(Hurray for using clearer language this time, Facebook!)

This new Facebook button allows you to unfollow someone without them knowing about it. Or the way I see it: unfriend someone without actually unfriending them.

So, since it’s January, and you are no doubt about to embark on another clean-up drive of your friends list, spare yourself some drama.

Hit Unfollow. (Rex Godinez Ortega)



About Recoy

Contrary to popular belief, he is not anti-social. Just selectively social. And he has selected to socialize with words. [Recoy is the Iligan-based journalist and blogger, Rex Godinez Ortega.]
This entry was posted in Essay and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to UnFollow

  1. Mary Kaye says:

    The “Following/ Follow” button has proven to be efficient (that’s right), but the act of deleting friends is also a great “OUCH!” for real (that is also right). It is a common fact that anyone will be offended once they are deleted. But then again, that button is indeed of great help, especially to people who have that “tremendous” Facebook problem. I think I had once used that before 🙂

  2. Remea says:

    UNFRIENDING is a mortal sin for us Filipinos. We are too sensitive and dramatic. Yes i totally agree with everything that is written here, in fact i’ve been itching to unfriend a lot of people, but then i realized that maybe these simple, senseless sometimes vomit worthy posts actually make others happy. I guess bringing people happiness even without exerting any effort is a good thing. Too much sadness in this world already. This 2014 lets try to #makeothershappy. Afterall its better to have too many friends than having 1 enemy. So thanks UNFOLLOW!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s